Thursday, June 09, 2005

(Written as a requirement for a job I applied today :P)

Have you ever felt very possessive about things? Have you ever felt reluctant to part with things, worse, to throw them away?

That's my biggest weakness, and I've been oftentimes criticized for it - which I naturally turn a deaf ear to. I have weaknesses to part with printed materials, or more accurately, anything readable. To me they are very precious, and I feel very guilty to throw anything away.

I have a large collection of books, that I don't have enough cupboards or bookshelves to keep them in, so they lay in boxes. They are my most precious belongings, that I would never sell or give away. I always hope that one day, I would have the time to reread the books that I've enjoyed, or read the books that I've bought with the intention to be read but not yet read (if only I have the time). The least that these books could do, I thought, after I die, someone could open a library as a tribute to me.

Whenever I go to exhibitions, I would be collecting brochures and informational booklets, and after reading them, I would have a hard time to throw them away. How could you, for they look so nice, and glossy; and look like people have gone through a lot of trouble to come up with them just for you. So I would keep them; again, in boxes.

I have stacks and stacks of magazines. Imagine, if a magazine had cost me RM8 when I bought them, the whole stacks would worth thousands of ringgit when you total them up. Those were my money - how could I ever throw them away?

The worst and the ugliest of the "reading materials" that I keep are my school notebooks and all my lecture notes. Ha ha! Imagine me, being a 34, turning to 35 year old woman, and still keeping the notes that I had taken ever since I was 14! Oh my God! That's a really long time. But again, you would understand it, wouldn't you? Those were my hard work - the sweatS I had poured, the sleepS I had sacrificed, and the hourS I had spent revising! (Yes, they are plural!) They carry the highest sentimental value of all.

Only recently, I was being made aware by a friend that what I thought as "love" on my part is actually a psychological disorder. And I am what people call a "hoarder". I can't believe it! However, I am thankful to that particular friend for opening my eyes, and I am now reevaluating all of my precious collections - which one should I start throwing away first?

No comments: